ARE YOU OFTEN SCREAMING AND FIGHTING?

There’s no such thing as a couple who always agrees on everything, but you shouldn't feel like you're on an emotional roller coaster.

“If your conflicts are incredibly intense and lead to drastic words or actions, then there is cause for concern,” says Erin Lewis Ballard, L.M.F.T., a marriage and family therapist. “Experiencing 'zero to sixty,' or being fine one day and then in crisis the next day, is also a sign that your relationship is toxic. And of course, any physical violence is a clear signal to get out now. (Find help here.)

ARE YOU CONSTANTLY KEEPING SCORE?

Relationships shouldn’t feel like a game of basketball where each person is keeping track of how many times they’ve done something good or even something bad.

“We all fall victim to this at times, but a relationship that is consumed by keeping score is toxic,” says Ballard. “Whether you and your partner constantly highlight one another's faults or you find yourself reciting your resume of good deeds, it's a sign that you've turned against each other." 

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